Within the Belly

The storm rages,

waves and rain

pelting our ship

with disenchanted hope.

Tumultuous ups

and downs throw us

about the abyss,

spanking our vessel

for trying to challenge fate,

as if Apollo himself

swirls his trident, laughing

at the discombobulation

of his creation.

Submerged in the sea,

in belly of the beast,

is a cabin I built

for you and me, a place

for us to meet and live happy…

Here, I lie with you holding me,

snuggled together

–a perfect fit–

and although the squall

may crash upon us,

through the stress,

in the darkness,

I find your eyes,

my door to a blue sky,

my rocket to a new planet,

where you whisper warm

wishes in my ear,

I love you, Kelley. I’m right here.”

And then your lips upon mine

BLOWS us into the stars of time.

(I pulled this from my journal, wrote it while sad a few ago. Then, I found this song, and I found a connection in the parallel. You blow my mind, Zach! Wish I had the balls to tell you this in real life;)

Let It Be Sung
Transcendental Power❤️‍🔥🥰

Yes, I’m acting like a child…and I love it. You’re never too old to fall in love slow❤️

My favorite part of the day is thinking of if I were with you, what would I do, what would I say…when I feel you’re near, everything seems crystal clear.

“Hold onto the dream, but not too tightly.”

Ouch!! Arrow through the heart. Oh my muse, my love you’ve won.

My sweet prince, you’re a big star. With you, I go far.

Beneath the Harvest Moon

Bite me! Prove you’re real.

Pinch me! Place my nipple erect between your teeth and nip a pinch of pleasure. Make a moan surge from out my mouth as your lips kiss my lips, wet ready for your dick to slip itself hard in, mounting and mounting your rock-head, pounding and pounding, filling me whole with pleasing pushes of passion whilst you poke, poke, poke at my soul, making us sing a duet of moans as you move in and out, in and out of my passion’s home, elation building in our bodies to slap, smack, and caress our core-connection as we fuck ourselves into a crechendo and we cum together beneath the eye of a Harvest Moon…

Knowing what we feel is true.

(Spinning like ballet dancers images of you and me cuddling in dreams of stunning scenes keep coming, a pleasure my face can’t hide as if you actually penitrated me, though it was in my mind…You make me crave in a craze kinda way just by smiling, imagine how it’d be in reality…

OOOHHH, BABY!

FEED ME MY CRAVING!

That moon does a number on me, kinda reminds of the girl I used to be, lol;)

More than a Baby

More than a baby

I’m an adult

My pacifier

I need it

Soothing the Sucking

My pacifier

I need it

Biting the Bawling

My pacifier

I need it

More than money

It makes me

Sweet as Honey

(I kept wanting to literally hold you as you fall asleep, and I kept picturing it, like me cradling your head on my chest, and I found this song, SOOOO reminds me of you in a crazy way, had to share:)

Rock Your Baby

(When I can feel you in my life, an actual part of my world, the spirit in my heart floats in an aura, magically beating color through my veins to my brain, producing random, unexpected moments of sheer joy in which I find myself smiling my eyes to tears I’m happy to be alive, so opposite of how my days were before you came into my life…I don’t understand exactly why you affect me this way, but I must state plain, you make me happy in a way I’ve never been, so whatever the repercussions, I’m rollin’ with it, lol;)

My Pacifier

The Midwest chill set in,

bone shiver like splinters

with humidity dampening

my shirt to skin, and then

heating pad draped long

across my chest, I picture

my pacifier to quell my mind

and to distract stress to tickle

my heart, a steady warmth

instead of beating it to death.

I move my lips in search

of new skin to lick into record

my repertoire of tid-bits

I’ve learned from the pacifier,

more often than not, I suck at…

my mind’s watering hole

You came to me, finally.

As the moon hid behind gloom, I lay awake waiting to dream, the pain insane, my muscles twitch with the inflammation itch…

Until…

My breath’s so calm sleep begins believing in relief and follows my subconscious into my mind’s watering hole to bathe in peace…

Then…

A weeping willow provides a canopy draping over my bed placed at the base of a river. The trickling of water over rock pulls my dreamy-eyed glare back to focus…

Finally…

I feel you curl up behind me, your long fingers sliding my hair from off my neck, and nipples pop out with the heat of your breathing as you cup my breast, entering…

(A part of me truly does feel this in and out of my day wanting a connection to you…your voice…your face and in me you pulsate.

That darn yearn is like the incessant meow of an alley cat, prancing its desire up and down my id, trying to trick me into giving in letting down my guard enough to entertain picturing what I really want.

As a wizard, you know what you can do. You do magic! Oh, my beautiful muse, grant me one wish, please make one more dream come true! Once more, I must see you. Say you’ll talk to me some day soon. Oh love, you have no idea the inspiration is in you for me…

Yes. My love feels crazy, but there are no notes of bad, my life’s just kinda sad. Hoping to change that.

Rain

The rain keeps falling, but I’m safe. I’m beneath the covers, holding onto you just below the surface in a graze of hot air we share, and we float as if engulfed in a cloud, steamy-eyed listening to the sounds of our hearts beating the rain.

This tickles me to smile despite the dark clouds crying:

Devil’s Dance (Big Bad Voodoo Daddy)

A Dream’s Truth

The dream is true.

We exist, dreaming of eating together the same peice of sweet truth. We listen to each other’s desires sung in the poetry of possibilities, a game of intrigue in which we spar scars and sorrow with love and laughter building trust in tomorrow.

The dream is true.

You are mine to play with anytime…

IN MY MIND.

I wish you were clay, and I could mold you into a clone of yourself and keep you with me in bed, probing you, pulling my fingers across every inch of your skin, nuzzling as I learn your grooves, your dimples, your lips with my kiss…

Yes, this is my wish as I shower away my sighs this morning, knowing my dream of love will only exist inside me, pent-up clenched tight, waiting for your light to do my dream right!

(I’m so lucky! Your voice through my day and reels at night help keep me going through the problems and pain as if you’re with me each day, except I barely say a thing.

For the first time since we met, I’m not afraid you’ll hate me or cut me off for something inappropriate I’ve said or might say some day. In my world, that’s more than progress, it’s truly established my trust. I struggle to hold onto people I love. Often it’s me who gets too scared to get hurt, so I run away and give up.

I’m trying to GROW UP.

Trust me, for the last 20 years, the wisdom in your music has helped me process my reality. Now, you really are a dream I NEED in me;)

I’ve been processing this feeling for a week and still don’t know how to say anything, lol.

I just keep reaching out to touch

An Ember to Remember

It still burns.

An ember to remember

when beauty touched my world,

it’s all I have left of you,

but for pictures I caress.

Yet, it still burns.

An ember to remember

how you looked at me

and I felt the heat

build up a hunger inside,

as if you could read my mind.

And still it burns.

Even as I’m drowning,

spitting water as foam

engulfed in a bubble of darknight…

Even then, it glows.

You are an ember to remember,

in me burning with a glittering

that will shine for all time.

a tide coming in

As you jog towards the ocean, feet flinging sand to tap the small of your back, secret skin exposed to the sun, then splashing through the foamy waves, you dive in where I take your hand…

You cradle me against your chest, sunset behind your head, crystal eyes gazing into mine, and as if you could read my mind, your wet lips slip salty kisses up my neck and along my jaw, then our lips part together welcoming a tide coming in with our tongues colliding…

(I keep seeing him do it again and again in my head so right now I can’t watch the video again, too dangerous. No, tonight I need to show how I can envision me fitting into his world for a beautiful moment, fulfilling my dream.

I stopped trying to deny I need help right now. Allowing myself to dream of him, despite the ‘never’ of it, invigorates me with power. I actually drove to four different places today that cause extreme anxiety, and even with having expired plates, the BMV felt sunny and happy!

I’ve felt like I’m living in the twilight zone for years and years and years, until color came back into my world because dreaming became not just powerful but possible.

It’s his face that gets me through my liminal space, and the wisdom of his voice brings sense and solace to a brain that so often gets lost in this mad world’s maze.

Liminal Space

I go to bed this way many a night. TV off, whole house dark, and finally a flicker, a tingle-spark, producing a pervading warmth from my bottom up with a swift burn of lust…and that’s when I go there…Instagram.

I only have to look at my own saved videos, and no one is the wiser.

He sings me to sleep for real, dreaming of gorgeous places and fun excursions (often writing or watching until I can’t see straight so that I can find some REM).

Dreams sit on the tip of my tongue by morning as I open my eyes at six, snores done he’s already on his phone or in the garage gone. Very little for me in the between.

I have his face as my saving grace:)

Falls

Back here, realty in my eyes clear, I shove furniture out of the way, constantly sweeping all animal hair and dust, leaving none stray. There’s this cloud that follows me around, so I zip…then zag…swiping dirty surfaces with a rag, until…

BAM!

The Cloud

F

A

L

L

S

Overwhelmed, breath caught in my throat:

This is it!

It’s DONE.

My eyes close as I drop my broom, rushing one hand over my heart, the other to cover my mouth, salty drips off my nose drop between my breasts.

Caught in time, going nowhere as my crime.

No! I say NO.

Deliberate action.

No more passive reaction.

I’d rather be alone

than in this kind of marriage limbo.

I don’t know how or when, but a change is coming. Damn it, I’m sick to death of running.

I want the attention of a kind caress!

I need a furtive dive into a deep kiss, where roving hands finger passionate bliss!

I wonder sometimes why I can’t just believe that someday something will click and someone will notice I deserve more…dick