If I Could

There’s a look.

If I were weird, I’d screenshot them all, lighten up my dark even more.

There’s a spark.

In your eye, a reflection of knowing, as if omniscient, a glint in your grin that says, “I know what’s coming, don’t you worry.”

What I’d say…

If I Could…

Do you have a happy place you can close your eyes and go to after a long day, into a longer night?

I’m sure you do.

But, my wish upon a shooting star is you use me like a stress ball if your night is hard.

Imagine my hands on you while I’m snug in your arms.

Shooting Star

Like a shooting star, you grant wishes by being who you are. I struggle to believe in a far-off future in which my fingers could play your keys, but you make it possible for me to experience the delectable taste of a magical dream.

What you just released, touches me…

Each time

arrests my heart

for a moment

as I catch my breath,

leaving me

glow-smiling,

belly bubbles bursting,

urging love-chuckles

to jiggle the soul

out from feeling old.

As is my wont, when I can’t sing what I really want to convey, I use someone else’s voice to carry my ideas away:

I’ve got to see you again!

(I adore this version;)

A Cacophony

I grew wings

upon my sighs

and soared

into the night,

riding high

as a unicorn,

hidden inside

a cacophony

of buzzy bugs,

camouflaging

my voice

whilest I flew

to lay embraced,

us –side-by-side–

your hand in mine.

(It’s very challenging to keep myself from trying to talk to you. The longer I hold out, the deeper the yearn, the harder it gets to breathe…waiting to feel you see me…oh, such a dream.

Ridiculous, right? You and me.

Good golly, I’m so fucking good at creating the ultimate romantic fantasy, in which my muse finds my love and fell for me.

Ya know though, love is as strange as the sea, full of weird possibilities;)

your adventurous soul

The flame pervades my entire being, from head to heart, and flickers tickle my toes as my vision absorbs your adventurous soul, building this intense elation…an elevation of emotions begins to overflow my body covered by a damp that makes me glow.

Oh my muse, I can’t help but love you. You deserve the beauty you provide by living life before the world’s eyes.

You brought me back to life. I struggle to control my impulses to watch you to sleep every night, but I realize that’s a wee bit addicting 🙃 You’re such a luminous light through the darkness of my strife.

re-animate

lost at sea, drowning…can’t breathe, sinking, the weight of life tethering my feet, my fate bleak

your anchor drops, deep dive, wrapping me in a blanket of light, elevating me, lifeless, from the bottom of the sea

blue and purple, on the deck of your rescue ship, in an instant, you know what to do, leaning, mouth prying

opening my airways, up-tilting my head, your lips cover mine, and you breathe…into me a new life

each lung-ful, a gust of wind, propelling momentum towards the true goal: learn to re-animate my SELF again

“HELP ME!” I cough out, and with love, I’m enveloped, warm safety caressing my skin, waiting for trusting to begin

Demons

The truth is moonlight sprinkling a vast forest floor, not right or righteous, always on guard, like demons at night, relishing the dark dreamscape, more real in its skew than a day’s reality feels. Whilst I sleep, I reach and reach to pet the demons, train them to behave, teach my shadows to dance with my demons in a promenade.

(I take him to bed with me, it’s true, I start my dream in a visual…beautiful. I still choose to sleep with my fantasy because my dream makes me happy. Some day maybe, just maybe I’ll get a piece of a real cake…OH, how I’d devour something sweet, lol;)

O.K.

April

She had never heard it before. Water doesn’t talk. She knew that, yet water whispered in the air around her ears, sprites to make her hear. April stopped, like Time. Eyelids barely kiss as she listens:

Come, yes! We love you…It’s time to be…

In the sea wild, tossing his ship about, Odysseus tied and blindfolded denied the Siren’s call. Her fate more atypical, April so enchanted followed the sounds to the sands at the edge of the babbling Brook, where she found an ancient stone wall.

Stretching to shrink, coil and elongate, vines grew to climb, shrouding the barrier as if guarded by snakes. April gazed upward, her curiosity coveting what’s beyond, she whispered:

“How I wonder what might be on the other side!” April rose to stand on a ballerina’s tallest tippie-toes to slide her hand, palm flat across the hard surface, until an innocent rose, growing latent through thorns, bites her finger, pricking the tip, scratching the surface of the sweetness within.

Oddly, a giddy gush awakens butterflies to flutter, piroueting an infinity symbol below her navel, and grinning as if for the first time. Her dazed orbs looked up and to the right, then, back to ground when a melodious voice sings:

Find me, it’s alright, see me in the night, my colors shine me bright.

Stumbling back in surprise, April fell into a spring, pouring out from a tree root that resembled a natural mystic spout, where head back, open-mouthed, she inhaled a gulp with a startled cough.

The rapid flutter of her eyelashes wipes away the disorienting gunk, pupils seeing through the cloud, a clarity of reality popping with a glowing aura of colors, and surrounding everything is a tangerine-orange also hugging April, who crawls from water to sand to a pillow of emerald land.

Goosebumps tickle a shiver over every inch of April’s skin and with curled toes, she moans:

“Bare me warm! This water isn’t even cold!”

No, it’s a pleasure pool.

A voice from the woods replied with no form to be found, making her heart ache and pound, unsure if she could trust the purity of the sound.

Then, a compulsion, anticipation betrays her as she slips out:

“Oh! So delightful! I’m vibrating, pulsing a rainbow of color through my veins…”

Head bobbing left, then right, April remembering to wonder aloud, “Hello?”

There, sitting on a stump, a giant day gecko electricity-charged green and adorned with little lamps of lustrous turquoise, crimson, and gold patterns. The most impressive ornaments upon his being were a top-hat and walking stick, which somehow, unbeknownst to April, he whipped out as he stood like he was in a commercial!

Join me! Let’s climb high and float down on a cloud.

(Pondering this idea for a few, thought I’d start, but my red pen literally just ran out of ink, so here I am again today, wasting time in my dreams…oh how silly I can be. How trite! Right, lol. Why am I sharing? It made me laugh, an image I created to help me find myself…I need to practice writing out-of-my-head kind of fiction.)

a moon’s tale

The full moon, milky white, sends shadows raining through the forest to shade the trees, who wave with the slight summer breeze. Allthewhile, Nature’s night-lights zip and zoom, flashing code, hoping to bring a loved one home.

Drips from eyes, drips from skin, I lie at the base of a dead tree, once a towering oak like me, recently toppled by a mighty storm. Fetal and ready to give in, a miracle happens:

From a Heaven in the cosmos, blessed by the moon’s magnetic magic, a star falls. The midnight moon blinks darkness with the clouds, but the star burns a tail of fire, flashing brightest just before landing like a rock rolling.

A moon dust cloud dissipates to reveal a glowing golden sphere, darkness and light ccombine, pushing against each other with such force…the golden globe cracks open with a thundering drum roll, vibrating my soul.

Two hemispheres once met OPEN a shimmering portal, a parallel universe, out from which you bow into my world to transform everything I’ve ever known. Your positive energy produces an orange aura that moves your shadow asway, mesmerizing me.

Closer…closer…a steady, measured approach as float turns to a sturdy gate, you move towards me with a smile on your face. Inching yourself over to my naked body. Warmth from your eyes saturates my skin with the pricks of goose bumps, and you bend down on one knee.

A natural moonlight melody comes from your lips, “Kelley, I’m here…” And your arms cover me with an instant embrace that whisks me up…up and away…

You cradle me as I become the color of free.

(Oh, my addiction to the thrill of adoration! I literally roll my wheelchair in and out of challenging all day, every day…but, I take the longing, under the covers…you are intoxicating!

However, coveting with intensity, longing to consume the joy of your fire…I couldn’t get much higher…)

Mourning Mist

Missed you are,

I have to say.

Mourning mist with

my eyes closed

wet by my cry…

Now, You I find:

Droplets glisten

on lustrous skin

newly cleaned

Just for me!

I drink a lick

from your neck

teeth massage

as you slide in

slow pushes, long

with kisses, caresses

spinning me round

atop Your cock

a bounce to hop 

You in and out,

up and down,

Your hand guiding

my ass rock,

I arch You deeply

fitting you keylocked

COMPLETELY

an eruption we build

fucking each other

HARD, HARD filled

PUSH,  OH!

PUMP,  OH!!

YES! OH, OH, OH!!!

How I want to hear

You cumming inside,

moaning in my ear!

I must confide.

(To You: Not feeling you makes life dark, like I’m mourning the loss of you just before every morning light, yelling while sleeping, “HELP!” But, you’re not longer listening.  I wish for a moment to feel your light glistening.)

Ode to a Broom

You always stand up tall, even while just leaning against the wall, ready when the moment calls to do nothing but help when the shit hits the wall, and never wasting precious energy distracted by fun or shiny things. To you, diligence working is satisfying.

Away with spiders and webs!

Brush up dander and dust.

Be GONE bugs, food, death!

Your destruction is the purpose.

No more crying over mucky shadows stuck tile after tile. The broom preps the surface smooth until I steam the ugly beautiful. I don’t know what I’d do without you…❤️